Saying Goodbye
by Melchy
Summary: Carolyn says goodbye to an old friend


Saying Good-bye

Melchy

Rating: G

_These characters do not belong to me but do let me take them out once in a while and then put them back. They belong to 20th Century Fox._

  


Carolyn's arms were full of books and she thought she just might make it to the door when the phone began to ring. "Martha!" She called out, before remembering that the housekeeper was outside hanging the wash on the line and probably couldn't hear her or the phone. Especially not with Candy blasting the record player with the new 45 she kept playing over and over.

  


"Blast!" Carolyn swore, reminding herself gently that she really should stop saying it. Trying to keep her mountain of books from toppling and walk backwards to the phone at the same time, she had just about made it when the first book jumped from the heap – the other's following.

  


"Blast!" she said again, grabbing for the insistent phone. "Hello?" She let out in a frazzled voice, looking at the books laying every-which-way on the floor. That would teach her to try to carry so many at one time!

  


"Lynnie, hi it's Dad."

  


"Dad!" her voice squealed like a little girl. "It's so good to hear from you." When he didn't answer right away, a cold feeling went down her spine. "Everything is okay, isn't it? Mother . . ."

  


"Mother's fine and so am I. No, honey, its Des. She died this morning."

  


"Oh no." She slumped down in the chair by the table, her knees feeling strangely weak. "Was she sick? I mean, what was wrong?"

  


"No, little girl. It's just that she was seventeen. It was her time to go. She was feeling a little wobbly last night. She didn't come to meet your Mamma when she got home from her Red Cross meeting yesterday. She couldn't find her at first. She finally found her laying on top of your bed, snuggled under the quilt down at the bottom. Em said Des just kind of looked up and meowed and went back to sleep. She was sort of wobbly when she came down into the kitchen a while later, and she didn't want to eat, just cuddle."

  


"Later Mama made her some tuna just the way she liked it and I let her have a little ice-cream. When bedtime came, she came in to sleep with us, which she rarely ever did, even when you weren't home. And then this morning when I got up, she was gone from our room. I found her out on the screened in porch laying in a box. She had pulled down your old winter coat that Mom keeps to run out to feed the birds and that's what she was laying on. I'm sorry Lynnie."

  


"Where . . . " Carolyn tried unsuccessfully to keep her voice from quivering. "Where . . . where did you bury her?" Her voice sounded hollow to her ears and she wished she could sit down but her knees wouldn't work. "Poor Des!"

  


"Out back, under her favorite tree. I said a little prayer over her, but you know I believe that animals have their own heaven. And I'm sure that Des is there now, playing with the dandelions and gulping tuna by the mouthful."

  


Carolyn laughed through her tears at the memory of Des' whiskers covered in tuna, her tongue going like crazy all over her face to make sure she got every bit. "I can't believe it's been seventeen years, " Carolyn found her voice. "It was just the other day I brought her home."

  


"I remember it well. _This is only until I can find someone to take her_,_ I'm not a cat person." _ Her father said in a soothing tone. "She changed your mind real fast about that!"

  


"She sure did. Oh Daddy – I should have been there!"

  


"You couldn't have stopped it, little girl. It was her time."

  


"I know, but . . . " her voice trembled. They talked awhile longer catching up on news of the kids before hanging up. Finally making her way to the chair, Carolyn sat down in it, propping her elbows up on the hall table, letting her head fall between her arms. The tears fell thick and fast and she let herself wallow in the relief of them. A warm hand touched the back of her neck and she raised up with a start.

  


"Mrs. Muir, what's the matter?" Martha looked down at the tear-streaked face of her employer. "I heard the phone, is it someone from home?"

  


"No, Martha." Carolyn wished he had a handkerchief, taking Martha's gratefully when it was handed to her. "It was my father. My cat died."

  


"That little monster you called a cat?" Martha laughed. "I never will forget that day she wiped out an entire dinner party!"

  


"When she ate all of the shrimp hors d'oeuvres'?" Carolyn couldn't help but laugh, ". . . and then started on the trout?"

  


"I'm so sorry Mrs. Muir. She must have been getting on in years. You had that cat before you were married, didn't you?"

  


"Yes, I did." Carolyn said in a voice that had gone back several years. She was such a tiny kitten. "Martha, I think I could really use a walk, would you . . . could you pick up Jonathan for me at ball practice?"

  


"And take these books back to the library?" Martha moved one with her shoe. "I'd be glad to."

  


Carolyn hugged her friend and headed for the front door, happy to get away with her thoughts for a while.

  


"Mrs. Muir, it's almost 2:00. If the Captain should come looking for you . . ."

  


"I'll be down on the beach."

  


********************************

  


Carolyn Williams took off her apron and hung it on the designated hook. It had been a busy night and she was more than ready for a break. She knew that more customers usually meant bigger tips and she had done well tonight, but she couldn't wait to get out into the night air and have a chance to breathe. She had put up with a table of college boys most of the night that had called her 'honey' and 'sweetie' and more than one had tried to pinch her backside, but she had smiled, secretly prepared to deck anyone one of them if they got out of hand.

  


"Hi Carey." Marisa Johnson waved to her as she walked out of the back door of the restaurant "Want a cigarette?"

  


"No, thanks." She shook her head. It was a habit she was trying to break, not sure how she had fallen into it in the first place. She had gone three days without one and was determined to stick with it. "I'm fine with my soda."

  


"You're a better person than I am." Marisa shrugged. "Well, time to get back to work. Have a good break."

  


Carolyn took a long drink, wishing for a breeze. It had been an unusually hot summer.

  


_"Meow!"_

  


"What was that?" Carolyn jerked her head up, her senses on alert. A car horn sounded not far from where she was standing and a group coming out of the restaurant, started yelling. Must not have been anything.

_"Meow!" _

  


There it was again. It sounded like a cat. But here? In the alleyway? "Must be a lot more tired than I thought." She leaned her head against the brick wall. She was looking forward to her day off tomorrow. Philip was going to take her on a picnic down by the lake and she had been looking forward to it all week. She really liked Philip and couldn't help but wonder if he might be _the one. _Her parents gently reminded that she had still four years of college ahead of her and she did want to go to college but if he was the one and she turned him down, would that be her only chance at love?

  


_"Meoooow."_

  


"Now I know that was a cat!" She set her drink down on the loading dock and started walking around behind the eating establishment.

  


_"Meow, Meow." _

  


"Kitty? Are you here somewhere? Kitty?"

_"Meooowwwww!"_

"Oh come on cat!" She stooped down to look under the delivery truck. "Where are you?" She had never been fond of cats. They had no loyalty like dogs and tended to think for themselves. "Where are you kitty?"

It was then she heard a noise in the Dumpster and she ran to look over the edge. There sitting in a box in the far corner of the garbage was a gray and white kitten. It's fur plastered to its head. "Meow." Its voice was getting weaker.

  


"Oh kitty," she tried to soothe it. "Hang on. I'll get you out." Leaning over the side of the smelly device she tried to reach the small cat but her fingers just barely grazed it's head. Trying to think of a better way to reach the animal, she looked around for a box or a chair to stand on. The kitten was close to wailing now "I'm working on it, cat!"

  


"Need a hand?" she heard his voice before she saw a tall, blonde, young man coming up behind her. She recognized him as one of the college boys that had been at her table. One of the more polite ones.

"Sounds like you're having a bit of a problem."

  


"Thank-you." She smiled at him. "I can't quite reach him, she seems to be stuck."

  


He smiled at her mixing of the genders so freely but followed her over to the Dumpster. Looking down at the small feline he soothed it with his voice. It's insistent crying lowering in volume. "I tell you what," he held out his hand toward Carolyn. "If I lower you down over the side, can you grab it?"

  


She looked down at the slop a little warily and he gave her an encouraging grin. "I won't let you fall. I promise. I'll hold you around your waist. You'll be okay."

  


Carolyn looked at the kitten, it's crying now nearly reaching decibels she thought humans couldn't hear. "All right. I'm ready."

  


Standing in front of the Dumpster, she pulled herself up to the top with her hands, his strong arms going around her waist. Leaning down into the trash, trying not to think about her backside tight against his firm chest, she saw that the cat was caught in some netting thrown away by the florist next door.

  


"Can you lower me a little further?" she called back. "He's stuck on some netting."

  


He pushed her down a little further into the Dumpster. Holding on to her for dear life, he was attentive to the sounds of the cat and the young girl who was trying to free it.

  


"Got it." She called back. Very carefully he pulled her toward him, letting her slide down him, until her feet were once more on the ground. The kitten was huddled against her chest, meowing just as pitifully, but not quite as loud.

  


"Thank-you." Carolyn smiled at the young man. I couldn't have done it without you. "I'm Carolyn Williams."

  


"Bobby Muir," he returned her smile. He reached out his hand to pet the cat who seemed to appreciate the gesture. "It's a cute one," he said. "I'm glad we could save it."

  


"Me too," she agreed. "I guess I'll take it home with me tonight until I can find someone to take it. Unless you want it?" and she held the little kitten up to him.

  


"I wish I could, but I can't. My apartment doesn't allow pets and I don't think my roommate would like her much. And my parent's dog might hurt it if I gave it to them. Cass is a sweet dog, but she plays rough," he shrugged. "I'd love to have her, but I can't."

  


"I understand. But thanks again for all of your help."

  


"Anytime, I can be of service, my lady," and he bowed deeply. "Maybe I'll see you around."

  


"Maybe." She said, hoping that she would. "Come on kitty, let's take you to Jack and see if he'll get you some milk. And in two hours we can go home."

  


***********************

  


After one day she knew she couldn't give the kitten to anyone else. She decided to name her Desdemona, after the part she had played in the senior play.

  


"You know Lynnie," her father had told her, "Once you name it there is no turning back!" And nothing could be more true.

  


Despite the fact that Carolyn kept insisting she was not a cat person, she fell more in love with the kitten every day. It wasn't long before Des was sleeping on her bed, waiting for scraps from the table and taking over the house in general. She even became a critic on Carolyn's boyfriends.

  


She couldn't seem to make up her mind about Philip. The thought of that little kitten, attacking him as he walked under the archway into the living room still made Carolyn laugh even after all these years. She and Philip did break up at the end of the summer, and Des seemed to think she had engineered the entire thing. When Jerry Morris started poking his head around, shortly afterwards, she let it known in no uncertain terms that he was not an acceptable companion for her mistress.

  


When she had moved into the dorm in September, Des was not allowed to go with her and the cat fussed about it for days. When she had gone home on her first weekend, Des had been waiting by the front door for her, not letting Carolyn out of her sight.

  


It was finals' week when Brad had called his daughter, telling her that Des was very sick and they were on their way out the door to take her to the vet. Carolyn borrowed her friend Susannah's car and headed for the animal hospital, wondering how she had gotten so attached to a cat.

  


Arriving at the vet's office, she steeled herself for whatever she might find out and ran into her parents as they were leaving. "Mom? Daddy?" She asked them, feeling the tears well up in her eyes.

  


"They want to keep her overnight." Brad explained. "She has a viral infection and needs some kind of transfusion or something. We were going to call you when we got home. Don't worry about this baby. You have finals."

  


"I know, but she's . . . she's so little and she's mine." Carolyn managed to get out. "I think I'll just wait here for a little while. I brought my books."

Finding a seat, she settled down with her History of the English language book on her lap, but she couldn't concentrate on it. In the six short months that she and what was his name – Bobby, had rescued the tiny kitten from the Dumpster, she had become very attached to it. Des was her best friend, she couldn't help but think. When she had first taken her to the vet, he had proclaimed the cat well, but said she would always be small and could have stomach problems later in life as she was severely malnourished. She might not live to be very old. "I don't care." Carolyn had told him. "She will always have a home with me for as long as she does live."

  


"Excuse me, but don't I know you?" The young girl looked up into the eyes of the man standing in front of her, those blue eyes, shining down in question.

  


"Yes," she smiled. "I believe you do. I'm Carolyn Williams."

  


"The cat girl," he smiled in recognition. "It's been driving me crazy, trying to figure out how I knew you."

  


With any other guy it would have been a pickup line, but she could tell he really meant it.

  


"Sit down, if you want." She moved her notebooks onto the floor.

  


"They have a good kennel here," he explained as he took the seat beside her, the chairs so narrow, their thighs touching. "My parents' are going to Florida for Christmas with my aunt and uncle and wanted me to bring Cass here. I think they are afraid I might lose her or something." His smile was contagious and it made her feel better.

  


"Des, the kitten, I named her Desdemona, is very sick and I know it's silly but I felt better about waiting here with her. I know I can't see her or touch her, but at least I'm here."

  


"I can understand that." He looked for a place to put his hands. "I hope she gets well. She was a cute little thing."

  


They sat in awkward silence for a while until he offered to help her study. Deciding to take him up on the offer, she handed him her book and he began to ask her questions. During the course of the next two hours, they did much more talking than studying and when they finally left after making sure that Des was sleeping and yes someone would call Carolyn, they were holding hands as he carried her books for her.

  


"Please let me know how she is." He asked Carolyn as he put her books in the trunk and then helped her into the driver's seat.

  


"I will." Carolyn promised. "And thank-you."

  


When she got the call to pick Des up two days later, Bobby Muir came with her. "I don't care if she is not allowed in the dorm, it's only for a couple of days. I want her with me."

  


Bobby showed up in the dorm lobby that night, 'to check on the cat' and had brought a toy for Des and flowers for Carolyn.

  


When Carolyn and Bobby shared their first kiss on Christmas Day under the mistletoe, in her parents living room, Des took all the credit. Meowing and purring and rubbing everyone's ankles, she seemed to be taking a bow. "Darn cat." Bobby cuddled her later that night on his lap, Carolyn cuddled against his side as they sat on the porch swing.

  


Her second year of college, Carolyn got an apartment with Susannah and Janie her two best friends and Des came to live with them. Des, a real beauty by then, took over the house and made sure she approved of everyone who came and went. The girls in the house adored her and she lived the life of a queen. No one came or went without her permission and the day that Blair Thompson had shown up was one that they were still talking about. Suffice it to say, Blair still held a few scars from the ordeal.

  


Carolyn sat down on a rock and let a few more tears fall. Des had been their entertainment and best confidant all rolled into one.

  


She had been a very attentive kitty, knowing that Susannah would need a warm body to cuddle when her father died or that Janie needed to pick her up and rock her, when she got a D in Biology. Des watched over them all, even turning into a chaperone for a very long weekend when she and Bobby and had been all alone and very much in love and the hormones had been humming.

  


Another bout of tears took over Carolyn and she wished she had brought a handkerchief or something.

  


"I can offer you a sleeve." Daniel Gregg's warm voice thrilled her down to her toes.

  


"Thank-you." She moved over a bit. "Sit down if you'd like," she said, in a voice that said 'please.'

  


"Martha told me about your loss. I'm very sorry Carolyn." He placed an arm around her shoulders.

  


She glanced down at his hand, still trying to get over the fact that he could indeed touch her – And that he wanted to.

  


"I had a cat on board ship that I was quite fond of. Coral was the finest feline I have ever had the pleasure of knowing. I know it's not quite the same, but in away I know how you feel. She wasn't in my life but for a few years. How long did you . . . ?"

  


"Seventeen years." Carolyn sniffed. "When I found her, I had just graduated from high school. Des was there for me through a lot. I should have been there for her."

  


"Seventeen years is a long time for a cat. It was her time. There is nothing you could have done." He echoed her father's words.

"I know." She leaned her head wearily against his shoulder and then wondered if she should have. For an answer he patted the top of her hair, lingering there for a moment before removing it.

  


They sat quietly for a minute and then her voice sounded from behind her tears. "I remember when Bobby and I got home from our honeymoon. Des was so angry with us for eloping without her permission. She wouldn't talk to either one of us for a week. She was worse than my father," She gave a small laugh.

  


"And when I was pregnant with Candy and so miserable and Bobby's father was always sending him out of town, Des would curl up beside me in bed and just let me pet her and cry on her and listen to all my complaining. They told us in the hospital not to let Des near the baby, but I couldn't have asked for a better baby-sitter – not with either of my children. She slept in the nursery with them from the day they came home."

  


They sat on that rock under the bright sun, the Captain listening attentively as he encouraged her to talk. He knew that talking would make her feel better and if he could talk her into writing a story about it, that it would help even more.

  


After a while, they got up and started to walk along the beach, her hand tucked safely in the crook of his arm. As they went along, Carolyn's mind went back in time once more, thinking of events so intertwined with her cat they could never be thought of alone. The first time she and Bobby had gone away on vacation and left Des with her parents, and they had received the cold shoulder when they came back. The next year when Des had spent the two weeks at the Muirs, she made them suffer for the same amount of time, upon returning home, eating the food they put out for her, but nothing else.

Often in their six years of marriage, Bobby had to go out of town on business for his father and Des was always there for Carolyn, trying to fill in the gap even though the cat seemed to sense it was in a small way. She would greet Carolyn every day when she came home from helping out at her mother in law's charities, allowing a good cuddle before dinner would have to be gotten and the kids into the bath and bed.

********************************

  


It had been a hot, muggy day and Carolyn was just praying for it to end. She had her hair pulled up off her neck. And casually dressed in a pair of shorts and one of Bobby's tee shirts, It was too hot to have any more clothes on then that. Most of the morning had been spent retrieving Jonathan's "Mr. Bunny" out from under the couch at least 1,000 times and trying to keep from yelling at him. The poor little boy was sick and it was hard to keep him in bed, when he wanted to go 'simming' with Candy at 'Grandpa's' house.

  


The phone rang and she ran to answer it, tripping over Candy's jacks, trying not to say the curse word that came to her lips. "Hello?" she reached for the receiver, sitting down to remove the sharp toy from her foot.

"Carolyn, Darling." Her mother's voice was on the other end. "Did your father give you the tickets for the Businessman's Banquet the other night, when you were here?"

  


"Banquet?" She stammered, racking her mind trying to remember what her mother was talking about.

"Yes, the Businessman's Banquet – Your father is getting that award tonight and it will mean so much to him if you and Bobby are there."

  


"No, he didn't. This is the first time I've heard about this . . . " Carolyn tried not to panic.

  


"I was afraid your father might pull that trick. He doesn't seem to think it's a big deal being named Philadelphia's Businessman of the Year. But I know it would mean more to him than he realizes to have you and Bobby there."

"What time is it? The banquet I mean."

  


"Seven p.m."

  


"Bobby doesn't even get home until six tonight, he had to go to that board meeting in New Jersey for Ralph since he and Marjorie are out of town. We will do our best."

  


Finally getting off the phone, she ran into the kitchen to get Jonathan some more juice and then ran to the bedroom to see if Bobby's tux was ready and what she might have to wear. Her green dress that Bobby liked so much was still at the cleaners and where the heck was the black one? Why hadn't her father told them? She could have been better prepared! Of course, she had gotten a late start on the morning, when she had given Bobby a different shirt to wear upon noticing his other one had a button missing and he had kissed her and somehow they ended up back in bed. Bobby had been fifteen minutes late leaving the house, but told her not to worry, he had an 'in' with the boss. Oh if only they had time for that to happen more often!

Des climbed up on the dresser and butted her head against Carolyn's hand, insisting that she be petted.

  


"I don't really have time for this right now." She tried to explain, but Des wouldn't take 'no' for an answer. Indulging her cat and herself for a moment, she picked up the gray and white feline and cuddled her under her chin, enjoying the soft feel of fur against her hot skin. In a moment of tenderness, Des reached up a paw and touched Carolyn's nose, bringing tears to Carolyn's eyes for some reason.

  


"Now, I really have to get to work!" she scolded her pet. "I hope I can find a baby-sitter this late. Why do I always find these things out at the last minute?"

  


The doorbell rang and she threw up her hands in agitation. Just a minute she looked frantically for a blouse to put on over the skimpy tee shirt but finally gave up, figuring whoever it was, had probably seen a lot more than she might be showing. She was surprised to see a policeman at the door, a policeman with a very serious face.

  


"Can I help you?" She asked, looking at him, thinking how young he was. Des had come to the door with her and was rubbing her ankles. "Des," she said in a firm voice, but the cat continued.

  


"Are you Mrs. Muir? Mrs. Robert Muir?" He asked, like he hated having to say the words.

"Yes, I am Carolyn Muir. Robert is my husband. What's wrong?" Her heart picked up speed.

"I'm very sorry ma'am. But there has been an accident, your husband is dead."

  


The next few days were a complete blur. The only thing she really remembered was the hugs of her children who were to little to realize that their father was gone forever and Des who wouldn't leave her side.

  


*********************

  


Carolyn gave out a little sob and Daniel stopped walking, turning her around to face him.

"My Dear, " he sounded anxious. "Please don't cry!"

  


"I'm sorry." She wiped the tears away with her hands. " I guess I'm just feeling a little melancholy today."

"With good reason." He caught her hands in his and held them in his grasp. Looking down into her face, she thought for a moment he might kiss her, but the moment passed and so did the possible kiss. "So, tell me, if you want, why weren't we blessed with Des' presence at Gull Cottage?"

  


They continued walking, this time his arm securely around her waist. "Well, it's kind of a long story, but if you don't mind hearing it . . ."

  


"I'm all ears," he assured her, with a chuckle in his voice.

  


"Well, after my husband died, everything was such a mess. There were so many meetings with lawyers and the reading of the will and what would we do with the house and was I eligible for Bobby's pension and retirement and through it all, Des was there for me. She seemed to know that things weren't right and she would, she looked for Bobby to come home for quite a while," Her voice became choked. "She would crawl into bed with me and be waiting for me every night and she became very protective of the children. It was almost as though she felt she had let me down by letting one of the family 'go missing' and she wasn't going to let it happen again."

  


When the dust finally cleared, it was decided that we would move in with Ralph and Marjorie and sell the house. Ralph wanted this more than anything and had been pushing it since the first day. It was the last thing I wanted but didn't know what else to do. So I agreed. But he was allergic to cats and told us we couldn't bring Des. I cried so hard that last night in our house. I talked to Bobby and told him how much I hated his father and I swear he answered me. _'Everything will be all right Carey, it will work out. Don't let him get to you.' _

  


"So, I went to see my parents and they said of course they would take Des. "She started her life here didn't she?" My father hugged me. "She should come home for a visit once in a while." Des was already eleven years old by then, and was starting to slow down. Mom and Dad have a huge back yard and she was familiar with it and I knew she'd be happy there. The day I took her over there I told her it was only temporary, but we both knew better."

  


"We stayed with the Muirs for a year and a half before I decided something had to be done about it. So, I got a job, rented a small apartment that the Muirs hated and moved in with my children. I wanted Des with us, but the apartment was small and she was getting set in her ways and I hated to uproot her again. And then, as it turned out, we got Scruffy and well, I guess it was better that way."

"When I decided to move to Schooner Bay and support us on my writing ability, I played with the idea of taking Des. I missed her so much but she had developed a kidney infection and was on special medication and I hated to think of moving her away from her vet she was used to and to tell you the truth I wasn't sure what I might find here."

  


"She loved being with Mom and Dad, I know she did, but sometimes I wonder if she missed me as much as I missed her. I was able to tell myself she wouldn't have liked Scruffy or the kids as they got older, but maybe I was wrong. I don't know. And now she's gone," and her lower lip trembled again. "I hate it when I cry," she tried to smile.

  


The seaman took her in his arms and held her tight against him, his lips softly kissing her hair. "It's all right Darling," he whispered. "Sometimes it's good for the soul. Cry as much as you need to. I will be here for you."

  


The sun was sinking as they walked back toward Gull Cottage, hand in hand. He was telling her the story about rescuing the cat with seven kittens which was one of her favorites and enjoying the sound of her giggles.

"Thank-you, Daniel." She stopped him, right before they entered the gate.

  


"For what my dear?"

  


"For everything. I feel at peace now about Des."

  


He opened the gate, letting her walk up the flagstone path ahead of him. Carolyn took a deep breath and enjoyed the whiff of salt she found in the air. Looking up into the sky, she saw a cloud, tinged red by the sunset and unmistakably in the shape of a cat.

  


"Have fun Des," she whispered. "I love you."

  
The End.   


  



End file.
